Um Yeah I used to live in Minneapolis and I talked to some of my friends used to live there and like the first few weeks of quarantine it was snowing still like I can't even imagine nothing.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That would be what I mean.


Yeah.


It's not it's not too bad here like I mean I can get out, you know, there's you know there's a lot of trails and stuff and could go on a walk and yeah, it's an amount.


Yeah. You got a formula. Our hope. Did you do that for quarantine?


Uh huh.


Started to like something?


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's funny like right when it started to pick up, I was kind of on a big big hike and it's kind of weird like there's people still.


Yeah like but uh yeah they've closed all the trails and stuff now so.


Okay. Yeah. I mean around here, Yeah, There one full, but yeah, I'm worried that they will be like a big second wave of infections on stuff when things reopen and people are, we'll see.


Yeah. But it seems like they're starting to open up a little bit. So it's like yeah. Oh. Oh yeah, I know. It's like yeah my sister is like uh she's just she's just finishing a medical school and she's starting to residency and june and I'm like, that's gonna be crazy.


Uh huh. Yeah. Crazy time to start.


Yeah. Exactly. So just like kind of worry about those people.


What? Yeah.


But do you know anybody that it's like god made or anything.


No, for sure. Different sure. Um, no one directly that I know is like confirmed infected with it. But like friends of friends are like friends, family members.


Mm hmm.


A few people I know have been like tested positive. Um, probably a few other people have it but never got tested.


All right. Yeah.


They just say because you?


Well, yeah.


Re all these, these reports, like there's a huge shortage of tests and things and people just if their, their symptoms aren't like that severe, they just assume they have it quarantine for a few weeks and and then Uh huh.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They had somebody that might work like was around somebody who tested positive.


Okay.


And he's like, they were like, okay, you can come and work anymore.


Yeah.


And they had like guys come in with like Hazmat suits and like spray the place down.


Is it like an author?


Yeah. Yeah. I was in office like and I have like, there's nobody that works around being like, like, You know, like a 30-foot radius.


All I'm all okay wow.


I'm like the only person. But they still were like, yeah, we're gonna come in here and spread. Yeah.


What is that like a lonely set up at work?


Mhm. Um So it's not, it wasn't always like that, but it has been since this whole thing um like uh we just one of the guys that kind of does similar, similar stuff to me and he's a lot older and he's like, you know, and he's like kind of a, you know, he has some health issues so he's like I'm just going to be working from home and you're going to be the one that's going in and making sure this this ship sails.


Okay. All right. Okay. Perhaps. Yeah. Right. Yeah.


So but it's kind of I mean it's just like the only person I talked to every day is like the the front desk administrator.


Yeah. Mhm.


You know, I'm just like, hey how's it going? It's kind of strange.


Yeah. Yeah.


But yeah, got the place to myself.


Yeah. What kind of work do you then?


Yeah, so I work for the local transit agency up here in Portland and I work for the they have like a pair of transits side so it's like for people with disabilities and beginning no rather normal bus systems.


Mhm. Okay. Right.


So yeah, I guess my titles like data analyst, but a lot of it is like supporting the system and doing a lot of kind of like, you know, writing reports and all sorts of stuff like that.


Yeah. Mhm. Okay. Do you have any like coding or?


Yeah. You do like python stuff, um, some data analysis with that just to kind of, Oh, really?


Okay. Okay. Yeah. I don't know any coding but yeah.


Yeah, I got a Master's and information systems a couple of years ago.


Were you sts major? Okay. Okay.


Um, but I actually did my undergrad and like completely different fields. Um and I, yeah, like actually did like education and talk for a little bit overseas actually.


Right. Yeah.


And I was like, I don't know if I can do teacher.


Yeah. What age were you teaching?


Yeah, just, it was like elementary school age.


Okay.


Yeah. So.


And you're kind of, you did that for a bit and you're just like, yeah.


No. Right. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.


Do you like your current yeah.


Right. Yeah, it's interesting and I don't know.


Is that what brought you to Portland or did you already live there?


Yes, I'm from here.


Okay. All right.


Yeah. Yeah.


I've never been. I heard it's nice gradually or I want, yeah, I watched the show Portlandia when it came out.


Yeah, that's the next place. Yeah, absolutely. Mm Yeah, there's, there's some accurate theater.


Um I know how accurate of a depiction that is but it looks like a fun way. I'm sure it's a pleasure or, wow.


Yeah, but they filmed it like on site and everything so it's like, yeah, so that's cool.


Yeah. Right. Right. That's cool.


But yeah, no, but yeah, san Diego though, it's like the dream it hey.


It's nice. Yeah I'm from the midwest and moved out here. Uh It's expensive. I'm sure Portland's expensive too.


Yeah, I don't think it's as bad as like san Diego California.


Yes. Yeah it's um but it's great down here. I love it. I love it. Mexican, superb.


Yes. Yeah.


Uh climates obviously great. It's kind of crowded but whatever nice place people over there.


Yeah.


It's not as bad as like L. A. Um Yeah, my brother lived in L.


Oh yeah. Yeah definitely.


A. For a couple of years and uh yeah uh you got to get out of there.


Mhm. Yeah. I've been I've not every like no one I've lived here for three years. I've not heard anyone in san Diego say that they love L. A. Or that they loved living in L. A. Or that it's like a fun place to been a long time.


Mhm. Yeah.


I visited a few times and had a good time. But I can see like not wanting to live there for sure.


It just seems like all right.


Yeah I went like visited him and he's like right on the beach and I was like, you know, for like three days I was there, I was like this is this is awesome. But then you're like okay, it costs a ton of money and yeah, exactly.


Right. It takes me 90 minutes to get to work.


It takes me 30 minutes to get anywhere.


Yeah right now it's pretty nice driving around, there's no traffic that's for sure.


I'm oh yeah I imagine. Yeah. Yeah. So you live in Portland now too Right.


Who's? Yeah. Yeah.


Very nice.


So are you setting chemistry?


Yeah I am yeah I've been here for like 2.5.


Nice, Nice.


Almost three years.


That's awesome.


Yeah it's been great.


Like what kind of feel that?


Yeah. Um I study, so technically I study physical chemistry but essentially I study atmospheric chemical reaction. So I recreate important reactions that happen in the atmosphere in a vacuum chamber in my lab. And then I studied how they happen.


Oh, nice.


I make molecules and then I shoot them with a laser and study how they.


That's crazy.


It's really cool. It's really hard. It's really really work.


Yeah.


But I enjoyed a lot. I'm learning a lot of useful things that will help me hopefully get a job.


The job market right now is not great but I got probably two more years of school here so.


Yeah. Yeah, mm hmm.


And san Diego is a great place. I'm sure you've got a masters in something you can't.


That's grad school is really hard and shitty sometimes, but nice to be in a cool place for it.


Mhm. Yeah. Yeah, totally san Diego would be uh top choice for sure.


We are, yeah, for in total average is like 5.5 years.


Yeah, that's cool. So how long is that? We said it's mhm, wow, just kind of like going to get your research time and stuff right, Like yeah, that's crazy.


It very personal person, but it's between five and six years usually. Yeah. Yeah, so you take classes for like a year and then it's pretty much all research depend on your field, but yeah.


Yeah. Yeah. God, I don't know, It was two years.


Right. All of your masters. Yeah.


I did it in Chicago. DePaul.


Oh nice. I have a friend in a PhD program there right now.


Mhm. Yeah.


It's what you like going there while I was like the one big city I went to A lot of the kids.


Nice. Yeah. Yeah, it was nice. Uh you know. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah.


I have a soft spot in my heart for Chicago. I love it. But it's definitely different. Did you like working there?


From the west coast. Yeah, it was nice.


All right, okay.


I've lived in new york for a little bit and that was awesome right after, right after I did my undergrad and move there and I didn't really know what I was going to do at that point in my life and I was just like just get their hair.


What was that like? Yeah. Right. Uh Did you, did you call you, were there a little bit or what did you teach in new york or what kind of work did you?


There were, I did a little bit, I did kind of did like substitute station and then I was like, it was right after the yeah, Like the 2008 recession, so it was like kind of like not the best timing, but and then I uh just like waiting tables and looking for a year and a half, two years and then it's like I have had enough, but it was visible places, a huge city, you know, and like possible.


Oh yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A couple of my friends from college or from new york, and then After we graduated, like 10 of them all moved to New York and they live in various places and hang out all the time.


Mm.


I'm pretty jealous. But yeah, they're like a lot of them are like part time volunteering at something related to what they want to do and then they're waiting tables are washing dishes or something, sort of how it is.


Yeah. Yeah. Mhm. Right. Yeah. Yeah. That's it felt like, yeah, when I was there, everybody was like, You know, grinding, you know, doing like 20 different internships at a time and like, you know.


Yeah. Yeah. Um Oh yeah.


Yeah. Yeah, it was, it was an extra same experience for sure.


Mhm. Where did we live?


I lived in um like little lower west side. I heard a kind of rash village area.


Oh no. All right.


Yeah, yeah, West Village Off of 6th Street Actually, the small apartment with my girlfriend at the time. And uh yeah, it was a cool spot. It was really cool spot.


And that's it.


Yeah. Great in Manhattan.


Very cool.


Yeah.


Yeah. I visited once had a great time.


I would love to live there someday. We'll see, we'll see your life.


Yeah. Not right now. Right.


Yeah, we know there now.


Uh huh, wow.


Yeah. So did you, so you lived in the midwest and then you move just moved to San Diego and that's, that's good.


Yeah. Yeah, I'm from Iowa and I went to undergrad in Minnesota and then straight out of undergrad I moved to san Diego, didn't know anybody here. Uh I mean the climate was great and it was you know, a great place to move to but I was like 22.


Mm.


I've never lived on my, I had a ruble.


Mhm. Yeah, and certainly don't know many people, right, Like it's just yeah, what?


Oh yeah. Yeah. Um uh Oh yeah and it was hard to, it was hard to find housing like remotely housing around created around the university where I live.


And it's a lot different than than the midwest. Uh huh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mhm.


It's crazy like undergrounds are doing unbelievable things to afford housing. But I had I like I was like so they have grad student housing that's like subsidized.


Yeah, he knows. Mm. Mhm.


Uh but I was on the wait list and I was on the wait list and I was on the wait list and they kept like and it just came down to like two weeks before I was supposed to move.


Right.


I was like I know where to live, so I had to accept like a spot in a a two bedroom plus a loft apartment with five people that I had never met.


Mhm. Oh, cheers.


And I talked to one of them over facebook once I was like I need to get there, I for sure have a place to live and like I can't keep waiting for this grand housing thing.


Oh God, how did it go?


So for like For like six months there were six of us in that department. And thank God they turned out to be like pretty cool dudes and it was all okay but wow that could have been so terrible and it will still like not there but once I once I was here for like a year and more secure social footing I found some better living arrangements.


Oh yeah, totally. Yeah. Yeah.


But yeah moving to san Diego was with a weird experience but Oh yeah Iowa my parents yeah wow.


Mm hmm. No. Yeah, it's not. I mean, yeah, no, there's some cities where, you know, you could probably get a house for super cheap. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah, but san Diego is one of those places. Yes.


Yeah but under their people were like renting out like subleasing their living rooms and like well for all these and stuff.


God, that's crazy. Like garages and stuff. Yeah.


Yeah like it's pretty wild.


Do you ever go, do you ever go like Tijuana?


I have been once, it's a very popular thing to do here.


Yeah, I uh oh it's just so crazy that people go hard to that.


They just don't but I think especially if you want to go out like go party, it's a good place to go.


But then I guess it's pretty much just do the right thing.


Yeah it's really like yeah it's pretty close um the border crossing can be like time consuming depending on which way you're going and what time of day, but they have, people will like Uber to the border and then walk across and that takes like uh like I think driving across is what takes forever.


It's like a suburb were like connected, so. Mhm. Uh huh. Yeah.


But yeah people go there like really really good food, it's really cheap, you can get beer for like a dollar.


Uh huh. Mhm.


Um It's a phone call.


I remember, yeah, my I went there when I was like in high school, I went to san Diego with like some trip for some basketball thing that one of my sisters was in and We went to Tijuana and I was like 17 and I was like, I thought I was hot shit and was like I'm going to get a beer and like, you know, they're like here you go.


There are. Uh huh. Yeah. Yeah.


Yeah, that was years ago. But I'm sure it's quite a bit different now, but I just remember it was like, yeah, I'm in Mexico.


Yeah. Yeah it's cool.


Yeah.


Um But yeah moving out here was a crazy experience.


Mhm. Yeah. Yeah, but just committed to Okay.


Yeah people people in the midwest like have no accurate perception of like what California is like the culture or anything, do you sir?


Yeah. Yeah.


Okay. It's like no I don't I don't have time.


It's funny because like, I don't know, like organs I guess is kind of the west coast, but it's a little, it's, you know, kind of different than California.


But um but yeah, like I could imagine like, you know, so maybe the midwest being like, yeah, like saved by the bell.


Oh yeah and they don't realize how big California is. Like my and uncle were like in uh san Francisco and then they bay area and then they went to Redding California, have you heard of that?


I think it's near And they're like okay Yeah and they're like maybe we'll just like drive down and see you.


Yeah, I've been there. Yeah, it's probably in between san Francisco Oregon. Yeah.


I was like do you have like 183 hours like each way like no you won't rest down, right?


Mm Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I like to drive like people like You can drive from like Portland to L.


Mhm.


A. And it's like if you are just cruising like not stopping, it would be like 18 hours.


Yeah. And yeah that won't be the case.


Will be traffic big.


Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah.


Yeah.


Yeah, I've been in California millions of times just if you could go there like every year, like my dad's from there.


So. Yeah. Uh huh.


What are some?


It's from kind of the bay Area. Kind of a not the greatest city, it's called Stockton.


Okay.


I don't yeah, it's kind of a rough rough spot.


Okay thank you.


But Yeah, it's like a in the valley uh probably 90 miles east of sectors.


Okay. Okay.


But we always pass reading and all those pots.


Yeah. Be driving down there. But yeah, it's a big place, a lot of people. Mhm.


Yeah for sure.


It's a yeah I've been there once.


40 million or something like that.


I've been in the Bay Area.


Oh yeah. Oh yeah.


No thanks.


Yeah.


I like san Francisco is a little cool places. It seems like different than L. A. Like kind of like the cityscape and the kind of, it seems more dense or something.


Uh huh.


But yeah.


Yeah something like that. I'm not sure.


Uh wow. Mhm.


Alright man. Uh Yeah we're good.


This is every better. Oh yeah we're past it right. What do we do next? Have it just.


I think on the other page you just hit the next era and we're let you go nice to meet you man.


Mhm. Sweet. Alright. Well good talking with you.


Take it easy.


Good luck in your school.


Thanks. Good luck with your job for you.


Yeah. Them.


Uh You and your family. Stay safe.


Yeah. You too.


Okay. Mhm. Shot my family. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Why isn't this weird? It's like flipped. Uh huh. Uh huh. Okay. Yeah. Mm. Hey, how you doing?


Yeah. Good. How are you?


I'm good.


Mr I'm just saying.


Let me start my time. Yeah, Located.


Uh huh.


The first thing I thought to myself, it was like, Oh, you have to talk for at least 25.


Yes.


I'm like, all right. When I hit the 25 and then I getting anything above 25.


Mhm. Uh huh. Your mid sentence and you just closed all this?


Right? I mean the way I look at it is like we're obviously going to be delivering such a high quality conversation, you know? So it's just like, why would I not want to get paid for every, every priceless second that we can get these people?


Uh huh. That's right, that's right. You gotta know your worth. Right.


But I'm nick it's nice to meet you.


Nice to meet you, Where are you from?


I'm from Orlando florida.


Okay, I'm in California in L.


How about you?


A.


Nice. So how did you like find this survey? I guess? Like what brought you to do this?


Um since covid actually I was like, I need to find ways to, you know, kind of uh add to my income here, so.


Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.


Yeah.


So it's prolific. Like the only platform that you do or do you do like other things.


Yeah. Um I do m turk here there, but this one is way better. So I really just, this is primarily the one I use.


Yeah, I do, I do in Turkey as well. It's funny because I actually think I'm Turkey is better than prolific.


Really? Why is that?


Yeah. The thing, I mean the thing about mturk is it's harder to use it, but like in my opinion, once you know how to use it, you can definitely make more money on them turk.


Mhm. Oh really?


Like I'd say I make about $40 a day on mturk, which is like a lot, which is a lot more than like what I do on here.


Oh wow. Oh, you know how much time though?


It definitely takes me probably like five or six hours somewhere around there.


Right.


But I mean, I don't I don't really have like too much going on right now, so I mean but Yeah.


Yeah. Go. Yeah. Yeah, I just get tired of it, like doing, I'm sure going to be like oh 10 cents for like however many minutes, and I was like oh it's driving me crazy, so no, I did.


Yeah, I mean the thing I use um do you know about like the scripts or like the extensions that you can use? No, you should look into it. There's one that I use. It's called, it's called like mturk or sweet or like mturk or sweet, something like that.


Mhm.


Um And it basically like it replaces like the normal like list that you have of like the hits or whatever um with like a different one that's like it's like more customizable.


Yeah. Mhm. Right. Yeah. Okay.


And like the whole idea is that like you can select hits that have already been taken.


Uh huh.


And you can like it like repeatedly to like make your computer repeatedly refresh those hits.


What?


So that like if someone who has it like claimed if they release it, you will be like the first person to get it because it's like it's like way faster than like what any like manual person could do.


Uh huh. No. Yeah.


So I just like I just like use a strategy like that and I only like do hits that are like a dollar or above bird.


Yeah. Yeah, I know, that's what I did. After a while I was doing some of the smaller ones and I was like no way. And then I was like just sorting and like I'm only doing like the top that give adequate.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.


Yeah.


But so what were you doing before all this all this stuff happened? Like what was your employment?


Uh Well I still actually have my job but costs have increased because like I used to be able to get like snacks at work and like, you know, obviously I wasn't using as much of my utilities because I wasn't home most of the day and now my grocery bill has increased and I'm using utilities like crazy so it's like okay, things are getting a bit tight, so Yeah, I know.


Okay. Right. Yeah. I mean, but we're like in two of like the worst states right now for for the pandemic, which is it's kind of crazy.


I know. I'm so angry at my state though, it's like we did a good job at first and I was like, ok, okay, we're not stupid and then they just went stupid and I.


Yeah. You guys are like killing it at first and they see the thing about here is that we were just terrible like from the very start.


Yes.


So it's like I don't even feel any kind of way right now.


I'm just like, you know, it's florida man.


Like people are going to do crazy stuff out here.


Mhm. I know. I feel like that's the norm in florida. Yeah.


Yeah. Everyone, I feel like everyone knows about like the florida man, like the florida man memes because um yeah, I mean we're definitely crazy.


Okay. Mhm Yeah, there's a radio station on your called karaoke and they do like this one um little like portion where it's like stories in florida and it's always like something crazy because that's just mm Yeah.


But I did read one time that like part of the reason why you hear more stories like that about florida than like the other states is because apparently there's like some weird law here where like news outlets or whatever are able to report more freely on like some of these like crazy things, like they're, they have like access to like arrest records that normally like in other states, there's like laws preventing you from like reporting on it.


Mhm cropping Yeah.


So apparently it's just like, it's a thing where it's like the information is more accessible here, so it gets reported on more and then it gets picked up more like in like the national media. So, I mean, you know, maybe we're not as crazy, you know, I just, you know, sometimes I tell that to myself just to make me feel better.


Oh. Mhm. Like you got it right, Only once um to go to like Epcot?


But I mean, I mean, honestly, I kind of just embrace it too at the same point, like, you definitely, have you ever been to florida before, or? Okay, Okay.


Not really, you know?


But Yeah, I've been I've been living here all my life 25 years and I've I've definitely seen some pretty crazy stuff.


Mhm Yeah.


So um there's definitely some truth to it, but I mean I think a big part of it has to do with like the heat.


Uh huh. Yeah, I feel like there has to be even if what you say is true, I still feel like maybe there's still a little crazier than the rest. Yeah.


Honestly, like I think um because I think there was like some studies that they did on that one time they were like examining like the crime rate and I think it was in new york and they like theorize that like a big reason why um crime rates have dropped so drastically in like the last 20 to 30 years um has been like, it's, I mean obviously it's like a huge like confluence of like a lot of different factors, but like part of it was that like the proliferation of just like, like air conditioning and stuff like that has kept people like out of the heat and like he like naturally like turns up like the aggression in people and makes them more likely to like acting reckless ways.


Yeah. Okay. Mhm. Mhm. Yeah. Oh. Oh yeah.


And apparently there was like something about like, like some like oil like and lead or something like that that had like something to do with it as well.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


Like the lead and oil was like making people act crazy.


Mhm.


I don't know.


Yeah.


It was kind of like vaguely read it. But yeah, that's um, that's my scientific knowledge for, for the night I guess.


Yeah. Okay, good. I think you guys having aligators helps to, with the craziness. I mean that's that's a whole other yeah.


Yeah. Yeah.


I mean one thing everyone in florida seen before is uh, an alligator just like crossing the street like randomly.


Mhm. Two mm.


I feel like everyone I've talked to is like had a story like that before and like it's just like normal, just kind of like shrug and they're just like, I don't send whatever.


Yeah, I guess.


Maybe it's like maybe it's someone's pet.


Mhm. Yeah, that's bananas. Oh man.


Yeah, I've actually eaten alligator before.


Yeah. Oh really?


It's pretty, it's pretty tasty actually. You'd be surprised.


I thought it was like gay me, you know.


I mean it is a little gamey, but like it also kind of just tastes like chicken. So it's kind of like a little more game here version of chicken.


Mhm. How did you go, how did you get about eating it?


Um It was just, I was in Miami for the weekend and there was like this like stand on the side of the road that was like advertising it. It's like not that uncommon, like it's not like you just go to like a normal restaurant or whatever, like a chain and they're going to have an alligator to like go to like, you know, sort of like a more backwoods, you need type area or like a more like um, like a local restaurant.


Mhm. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.


Um You might be like more likely to like find it.


Mhm.


It's like a novelty thing I think.


Yeah, interesting.


You know, I don't think anyone is like out there like, you know, surviving or eating alligator all the time.


You never know.


But yeah, I mean, I'm trying to get away from eating meat in general though.


Especially in your statement. Yeah.


So I mean, hopefully hopefully I can do that.


Oh, really? Why is that?


I don't know to be honest.


Yeah.


Like, I mean, I mean a big part of it for me is definitely the environmental reasons and like I definitely um I don't really support like factory farming I guess.


Yeah. Yes. Mhm.


So like that's like a big part of the reason.


But also recently I've just been like kind of like appalled by like eating me.


Okay. Yeah. Oh.


It's like super weird because I've always been like meat or like my whole life like, you know, I love like chicken, like, you know, steak, like whatever, like I'll eat it.


Oh. Mhm. Mhm.


But for some reason like lately it's just been like super like grossed out by almost like I've been like having to like force myself but at the same time like I don't really know like enough about like going vegan or like vegetarian I guess.


Mm hmm. Mhm. No. Yeah.


So. I kind of feel like I'm stuck in like a little bit of like a weird place right now.


Mhm. You're thinking vegan and engineering is vegan is so much more strict.


But yeah, vegans a lot more strict. I mean, I don't know, I mean part of it kind of wants to do it just to like go like all the way, you know what I mean?


But like I feel like from a more like practical standpoint like it probably makes more sense to like go vegetarian first, you know?


Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. I mean it's like queen smoking, you know, it's like probably a little too hard to go vegan right away, but I never like I'm a really picky eater.


Right. Right. I mean, Yeah.


So like to just eat a vegan diet. I think I'd starve to death, literally. So.


Okay. Yeah. I used to, I used to be a really picky eater too when I was like a like a kid, I wouldn't like anything, it would just be like the most basic like pizza, like chicken nuggets.


Mm hmm. Oh yeah.


Like anything like green, anything like that was like a fruit.


Yeah.


I was just like, no, I get that away from me, but I kind of like just like when I got older I just kind of was like all right, like you stop being like a baby about this and just kind of like start trying to eat some more stuff and it kind of worked out.


So I mean, I don't know.


Yeah. No, it's it's very visceral for me. Like I'm really sensitive with textures, so like I just, I like there's certain things I just cannot eat.


Mm it's good. My gosh, yeah, have you ever have you ever done that?


So yes.


Like have you ever heard of it?


Mm.


Like some people are like super tasters or whatever?


Yeah. Yeah, I've heard of that and I've had people tell me that I might be um like there was this one test where I could taste like bitter and other people, but it or something like that.


Yeah. Mhm.


So they're like, oh, maybe, but I really have no idea.


Yeah, I don't know. I mean I thought I used to think I was like that too, but I think I'm probably just normal.


Like I I kind of want to be like special, like, oh, I'm part of the like the like, point whatever percent that like, like no, I'm not really, I'm probably just an average guy.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, disappointing. I mean if there's an Aaron onion in my food, I will find it and so I don't know.


Yeah. Yeah, I feel you on that. I feel you on that.


Um Yeah, there was another condition to like when I was younger, like I super desperately like wanted to convince myself, I don't know if you ever heard of it, It's called like um synesthesia where it's like, you see the colors or whatever, like Yeah, but like I super was just like, oh my God, that would be like the coolest thing, like, and I'm like, I was like, I remember one time I was like, I was like a lot younger, I was telling myself like, yeah, like sometimes when you read this like you can definitely see it.


Mhm. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of different forms. Yeah. Mm. Mhm, awful. Mhm.


Like you just got to like concentrate, like close your eyes like, you know what man?


Yeah.


You're just that's not you.


Mhm.


Like it would be cool if it was you, but you know, sometimes you just got to accept accept the hand you've been dealt.


Yeah. Mm. Yeah.


Um Yeah, I don't know.


Get away from her classmates had one form of it. It's pretty interesting, but yeah. Yeah.


I feel like it would be like super cool. Like you're just like this mysterious dude playing the piano.


You got your like your eyes close, your just seeing like explosions of like color and like, like all this other stuff.


But no.


Uh huh. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know, some forms though. Like people are bothered by it because it's distracting or it's limited.


Right. Right. Right. I could definitely see that too.


Like that's that's the funny thing about life. Like so many people want like to be like a certain way or like they want to have like a certain uniqueness about them and then like you have those people that actually do have that thing and they're just like, nah, I really just wish I was normal, like you could, you could have this, like someone take this from you, like it's probably, it's not as cool as like you think it is, but you know.


Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Like the grass is always greener. Like we so need please.


Yeah, exactly, exactly.


Was it? Yeah. So are you in school or like what?


Yeah, no, I graduated um two yeah, two years ago now um and I was doing, I was living in new york um doing a paid internship and then like everything, the world kind of like exploded and things got like super crazy up there.


Mm mhm. No. Yeah. Uh As somewhere safer?


So like, I was like, you know what, I think I'm gonna dip out like now it's not, I can go back like home back to florida, I mean, so I mean objectively I went from somewhere safer to a more dangerous place.


All right.


But I mean the thing is that like, you have more control down here, like just because like obviously it's not nearly as dense as like new york's like you're like there, you almost have no choice like even if you just leave to go for a walk like you know you're probably gonna pass like at least several different people that are like within like a six ft range of you.


Yeah. Who left? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


Whereas like over here like you know I can get up early in the morning and like go for Iran and like you know pretty much know that I won't have to worry about like anyone like in my neighborhood like you know being out at the same time or anything like that.


Yeah. Because yeah.


So it kind of gives me like more of like a peace of mind.


Do you live like suburbs or?


Yeah it's like pretty suburban.


Oh.


I mean it's like I'm like 15 minutes outside like Orlando City limits so it's like not as like dense as you would expect.


Oh yeah.


So there's like a lot of like greenery and stuff like that.


What? Oh, nice.


Right?


What were you what was the internship in new york? Like what mary?


It was, it was for an NGO, it was called the independent diplomat.


Um I studied economics and international business in college.


Mhm. Oh, so um that's very cool.


Um So the, it was basically just like I was interning and helping you know the main guy, I mean I guess you could say and we were just like connecting with like a lot of different Ngos like all over the globe and like helping them like do like fundraising and like doing business like analytics for them and just things like that. And yeah, it was pretty cool. I was enjoying it a lot and I still had like a few months left. But I mean understand understandably like you know everything had to had to get shut down the way that it did.


Yeah. Yeah.


So yeah right right.


Yeah. It just sucks knowing that like if we had done things like properly like a really country, we'd be much.


Like you literally like read the news like in like Korea they're just like normal like nothing even happened because they actually just like took it seriously and like we're still over here just like my freedom, my right to not wear a mask.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mm.


It's like, dude just put the mask on like just stop like you don't look weird with the mask on like no one is judging you for wearing the mask.


Yeah. Like everyone else, Right.


Like it's not hard, you're not gonna die like.


Uh huh. You can breathe.


Yes you can you can breathe.


Believe me.


In fact that is for sure.


I that's the dumbest thing ever.


Um Yeah, I don't know.


Mm.


It's I've been like really like down on just this whole like country especially because like I mean I was before this to, you know with the way like the past few years have gone like and our current administration and stuff like that.


Mhm. Mhm. Yeah.


But I mean like singing like this has like really like kind of made me like pessimistic like before I would consider myself like an optimist like you know like like like I think about like bigger things too.


Yeah.


Like I think about like you know if we can't even like if in one of the biggest countries on earth we can't even control like a pandemic. You know, how are we going to stop like the threat of like global warming or like you know, how are we going to tackle like these issues that are like even bigger that are like even more complex.


Okay. Mhm.


Like it just seems impossible honestly. Because we can't even you know, we can't even get our shit together basically for like one thing.


Yeah. I mean that's the worst part is that we don't even try, you don't even want to, you know?


Mm Right? Exactly.


Mhm.


But I mean I think it's a big part of it is just because we've become so like we become so polarized politically. You know? It's like you can't nothing can happen anymore without it. Like immediately being viewed through a political lens in the moment.


Like you view it through a political lens like it becomes like, you know, because we have a two party system is automatically like this side versus that side. And it's like, you know when you're in the competition with a competition with someone, it's like you can't win unless the other side loses and it just like makes people act like Children. I feel like.


Yeah. Well, that's what's crazy though about a lot of our political issues right now, is that most of the country actually agrees like there's a majority agreement of 75 80%.


Uh huh. Yeah.


It's our it's our government itself, it's like we're not gonna listen to you by the NRA so we're good.


Right. Right. Right. Right. Oh my God. Yeah. That's then alright.


That's like a trigger word for me. I start to hear that I'm just like, it's like I tensed up a little bit, you know?


Uh huh. Especially part out.


Yeah, because we've definitely had like something like the more notable like shootings from like the past couple of years.


Um I mean I don't blame you definitely if you come definitely be mentally on the look out, you know what I mean?


I'm honestly terrified to go to your state partly because of that. Yeah. Yeah. Uh Okay.


Like things, things are liable to go south at any moment, you know?


Gosh.


But yeah, yeah, the shootings crazy.


It's care.


Especially the one that hit me really hard was at the Pulse nightclub because that's only like 20 minutes from where I live right now.


Mhm. No.


And like, I know people are like used to work there and like used to go there a lot and it's just like, I mean thankfully like I didn't like personally lose anybody like that night that I know of, but like, I mean it's just so crazy that something like that could even happen, you know?


Yeah. Yeah that's yeah that's insane, particularly close to you.


Yeah, I mean, I'm sure that, you know, there's so many people around the country that have similar stories of just like, I mean, I saw like one crazy stat where it was like, I don't even remember, it was like, there's like, there hasn't been more than like five days in a row or something over the past few years that there hasn't been like a school shooting or something.


Yeah. Yeah. No. Yeah. Yeah.


Like, we can't even go like a few days as a country without like, shots being fired in a school zone.


Uh huh. Oh yeah.


Like, you know, this is where like, we have kids for education, like, like, it should be like the most like sake one of the most sacred places, right? And we've like, we basically allowed it to like turn into like, am I going to go to school this morning and get an education?


Yeah. Right mm. Yeah mm.


Am I gonna get shot in the face? Like, who really knows? It's just like, that's such a terrible feeling to have, you know what I mean?


Yeah you don't have to worry about your Children not coming home from school because yeah.


Mhm. Exactly. That's supposed to be like the safe place, like, so like they're in school like I know where they're at like you know they can be accounted for and it's just like you almost rather they were like out in the streets like on their own because like they feel like they're less likely to get shot like just hanging out on the street.


Mhm. Mhm. Yes.


You know what I mean? Like?


Yeah and I saw something that said like after columbine a bunch of schools started bringing in like officer security guards and one of the schools and they literally haven't stopped a single school shooting and it's just a bunch of minority Children have been like jailed and eventually arrested for like regular uh behavioral issues that aren't crimes.


But mm Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Mhm. Exactly.


Mm.


I mean there was that, I don't know if you saw that video from like a couple of weeks ago to where there was like a school officer or whatever who was like basically like beating up this like Like 11 year old girl like saying like oh you need to be like apprehended like you're acting crazy and so like dude what are you doing?


Yeah. Yeah. Mhm, mm. Oh what's that?


Like this is like a kid like stop Exactly.


Is that I don't even know which video talking about because I can think of like four separately.


Like you don't even, you don't even know but like you know that you've seen that or you've seen something so close to it that it doesn't even matter.


Uh huh. Mhm. Mhm. Yeah.


I mean the whole, you know the whole thing, it's just crazy.


Yeah, I know.


I mean this whole, I mean it's so cliche to say at this point, but like this whole year has just been like such like and it's not even, we're barely even like over the halfway point. You know what I mean? Like I'm almost like scared to think of like some of the things that you know have yet to happen or like could be happening soon.


Yeah. Yeah. Well it's gonna be a long time recovery to from everything that's happened the last year for years, you know?


Right. Exactly. I mean that's also, you know, knock on wood assuming that we don't have another four years in store.


Mhm, mm. Uh huh.


I mean that's like that's the biggest like fear that I have right now is like, dude, we have to get this guy out of the white house like Mhm.


Um and I know I have to like not think about it because it just gets me like so upset. You know, I have to just like take a break.


Right. I mean the thing is like, you almost can't I mean almost think that like, and I'm assuming whoever is going to be like studying these conversations is going to like figure out like, you know, we're just two strangers having a conversation and this entire time, like we pretty much haven't talked about anything that's like not like political or like covid related. It's just like I think that just speaks to like where like the global like mindset is right now, like it's really hard for I think anyone to be thinking about like, you know, more positive things.


Yeah.


They're just like some of their more normal activities because you know, we have so much stuff going on right now.


Yeah. There's so much actual serious stuff that has very real and negative effects right now that it's hard to let's talk about something, you know, Brooklyn.


Yeah. All right. Right. Mhm. Yeah. Well, let's talk about like sports or like, you know what I mean?


It's like, I mean, I would I would love to be like talking about sports with my friends right now, But it's like, it's like, I don't know that, you know, I can't I haven't even really thought about it ever since.


Thank you. Mhm.


Like all the sports like stops because it's just, you know, it's been so nonstop, Right?


Although it upsets me, they're trying to push for them to come back. I mean that's not safe like it's so stupid. I love sports, I'm dying for them to come back. But my number one concern is safety, like no risking their lives for a fucking baseball game or hockey game like.


Right. Right. And then it's another thing too, is like, there's like so many of these leagues are trying to restart in florida, like in one of the worst places that you could be in right now.


Mhm. Yeah. Mhm.


Like why don't we someone should have built like an area like in the desert or something that I mean where you could like actually like isolate people the like they're just going to be in the middle of like one of the biggest hotspots in the entire world.


Yeah. Hey? Mhm. No. Seriously?


It's just it feels like inevitable fucking governor man.


Yeah. With the governor who's like, we're fine. Uh huh. Mm.


I mean, our governor, that's the thing too, is like our governor is like, he's so dumb because he just, his entire objective is just to look good for trump.


Uh huh. Yeah. Yes.


He's like, I just want trump like anything trump says like absolutely will support it, like he just basically wants to score like brownie points with him, and I'm just like like dude, I feel like trump is so like mentally like Sina, like he probably doesn't even know who you are, you're you're one of the governors of like in our country, but you probably like you probably even know your name, like who knows what this man is thinking about right now, because it's definitely not like you know the state of the country, because if it was, I mean he would be doing things differently.


Nothing. Yeah. So pathetic. No. Yeah. Oh yes. Yeah, that's yeah. Seriously only cares about golfing and Yeah.


But uh oh my God, golf, I feel like he's like one of the reasons why like I hate that sport now, like I just like associate golfing with like trump and just like oh like rich white people that like hate everyone.


Oh. Uh huh.


Just like man.


It's a good for that.


Which sucked is like there's like actual like respectable golfers of course like you know I mean?


Yeah. Yeah.


But like it's just a sport like anything else. But I feel like it's just like attracts like one of the worst like crowds, you know?


Yeah. That's funny. I think I've definitely grown to dislike it more than I used to. So that my I know I have an automatic negative connection with it now, that's for sure.


Right? Exactly. I kind of used to be a fan like back when like Tiger Woods was like winning like all the majors and stuff like that, but now I'm just like no it's good to get out of here. Stop golf.


Yeah.


Yeah for sure you say you're into sports like what's your what's your favorite sport?


Mhm. Yeah, hockey is my favorite.


Yeah. Okay okay let's okay, hockey is like like one of the few sports, I don't know like really anything about I mean like I know about it but like I don't follow it like that, but I kind of felt like basketball is my sport, but I kind of make a point to like follow most of the major sports.


Yeah. Hockey even I'd say. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Not I used to follow football but with Kaepernick and the Washington's domestic back.


Right? Well, they're supposedly they're changing the name. I don't know if you heard that supposedly.


I mean, you know, they set them up like four times and every time they're like, no, it's fine.


Uh Yeah.


You're like, no, it's it's not everyone like it's so infuriating because this keeps coming up and like, you know, every time you get hopeful and then nothing happens and then people continue to use it and I find it incredibly offensive, you know?


Yeah. Mhm.


And so it's just like uh huh.


Yeah, I feel you on that, but I think we have reached our time according to my timer.


Uh huh. Yeah. Good, good.


All right. It was a pleasure.


I was on my side.


It's a pleasure talking to you. Do you wait do you know if we have to like do it like can we just close the tab or do we don't?


Oh, yeah. I think we can close this one and let's go back together when we had open.


All right. Sounds good. All right.


All right, bye.


Take care. Bye.


I don't really actually dr yeah, thank you, thank you. Oh good hurry up.


How you doing? Pretty good.


Yeah. See uh uh from Maine, where are you from?


Where are you from? Michigan?


How are things in michigan?


Oh uh pretty nice today.


Yeah.


About 50. About 50°..


Thanks. Yeah, we've had some pretty warm weather here too that's cooled off a little bit done in uh around 50, but it was 70 yesterday, so.


Yeah. Yeah we had like three days in a role that were 70.


It's unusual for us so.


Yeah. Yeah, same here supposed to be uh usually it's a lot colder, usually have snow right now, but nothing yet now ever been to pain before.


Yeah. Yeah. Not yet here either, I'm not looking forward to it. Mhm. I never have no.


Yeah, it's pretty nice. It's probably a lot. It's uh trying to think. I've only been to michigan, I've driven through michigan and I've been to Detroit and that's about it. I've never actually spent spend any time there, yep.


Yeah I live in Lansing the capital. Um It's nicer up north you know I think. But but I was born in here so.


Yeah. Uh huh.


Yeah, well a lot of trees that, I mean it's a very like heavily wooded state, isn't it?


Yeah. Yeah pretty much.


Oh yeah, yeah, we live where we live is very uh pretty heavily wooded, lot of lakes, a lot of rivers, yep.


I mean I'm in the city so you know um it's nicer up by the lakes you know? But yeah. Yeah. Yeah I would like to come there sometime. I always thought about it. I've been to new york and California and texas and all of them but never out.


Yeah, I mean never up into New England uh made in California have a lot in common.


Yeah wow. Yeah. Now.


I mean both have like big coastlines and the people are kind of similar, tend to be like a little more liberal and you get a lot of hippies and a lot of people are interested in outdoor activity, like backpacking and fishing and stuff like that.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


Where'd you go, where'd you go in California?


Yeah I lived when I was younger kid um in Garden Grove and it's by Long Beach.


But it's not. Oh southern, so there's nothing.


Yeah I lived with for about a year.


Mhm. Yeah I've never really never been to super the southern like phone into Los Angeles before and I think the further south have been is like like palm springs, that area um like the uh there's a a national park down there, Joshua tree.


Yeah. Yeah. Mhm. Right. Okay.


Yeah yeah.


Oh yeah I've heard over that and I lived in florida for a couple years. Um Clearwater. So when I when I, oh but I always end up back here.


Before water. Yeah yep that's a nice area. Same here. I used to travel all the time for work and uh travel lodges for for you know going hiking and stuff. And we always end up back in Maine where we grew up, our families are here.


Yeah. Mhm.


So um how are things pandemic wise in your area?


No. Yeah. Yeah it's pretty bad.


Michigan right now? Is it, are people wearing masks are like following the rules?


It is is pretty bad. Well okay well some some you know worse don't you know?


Yeah. Yeah.


So how about there now mm.


Um It's a mix, you know, it's it's pretty bad in Maine right now. Like I just heard that we're one of the like it's spreading quicker and main than anywhere else. Um And we still see a lot of people around here that don't wear masks, which is kind of disappointing. Um Yeah, I mean we live in a really small neighborhood and we now have like multiple neighbors around us that have it. Um people that are in the hospital with it like our neighbors. So it's definitely all of a sudden became like a lot more real I think to a lot of people.


Right. Yeah it's pretty bad here I mean it calmed down a little bit and now it's getting bad again you know So yeah that's how it is here really that I stay home awhile I'm disabled so I'm home you know I don't work anymore so I stay in as much as I can you know.


Yeah. Yeah. We never really had that first spike here. It was like you were doing really, really well until about two weeks ago and not just all of a sudden, Uh, you know, we went for having like 10 cases a day that like 200. Mm Yeah, probably a good idea.


Yeah I think so I don't know I have some health problems so I don't want to get that you know mm.


Yeah, yeah, totally understandable. I mean we're super cautious my life and I wrote super cautious, but we both work with the public. So it's um, yeah, it is what it is.


Yeah. Right. Right.


You know, we wear a mask and we try to be as careful as possible and just, yeah, just ready, ready for it to be over sometime soon here.


Right. Yeah. Right. Yeah that's all you can feel. Yeah if it ever does get over with.


All right. Yeah. Yeah, it's hard. No, I mean, it just seems like, I remember when we first found out about it at the beginning of the year, thinking of, you know, there's no way, you know by christmas time that this will still be going on we'll figure it out. And uh yeah here we are getting ready to go into the holidays and it's still getting worse.


Mhm. Has been what six months it's terrible.


Mm. Yeah.


Yeah maybe not the things that go back to normal.


Yeah. Yeah. It would it would be nice. Yeah. Works definitely been a little a little slower since since the pandemic and yeah we like to travel to family you know across the US that we haven't seen.


Mhm.


You know we're supposed to go out to California and visit family and cancel that people are having kids and cancelling weddings and you know it's just it's very strange strange time.


Yeah you know it is strange it really is okay.


Um uh Jason what? Yeah what else uh what did you do?


Yeah. Yes yeah.


Um I mean did you have a job like prior to what you're doing now? Mhm.


Um I haven't worked in a number of years it's been probably mm nine years probably and I worked in a state building.


Yeah. Yeah.


I was ahead cook there so and I love it I love to cook.


Oh. Mhm. Was cooking something you like? Medium?


No.


What you got any specialties?


Oh I can make anything anything.


Contact? Uh huh. Yeah.


But um yeah it's one of my passions you know I really like it.


Yeah. I love cooking too. It's nice. Especially now it's like because we never never go out to eat and we don't really ever get take out if you can cook for yourself.


Right right A woman I won't go in a restaurant and just you know I mean we do get takeout now and then but um I get my groceries delivered.


You know if you don't mind putting the time and the effort in um you know you can make a meal that's better than most restaurants and you don't have to go deal with other people. Which is pretty nice. I feel bad for people that can't cook, yep. Yeah.


Do I don't want to go in the stores?


Yeah. I wish we had that unfortunately. Don't grocery delivery hasn't made it to this area of main yet.


Oh yeah I love it.


Yeah. Sorry to interrupt.


They also have pick up where you can just order it online and then pick it up if you want.


Yeah, that's pretty nice.


I do that sometimes. But um I like it. I don't have to go in the stores, I just do my shopping online, you know?


Yeah, we definitely did. We shop like buy stuff on amazon but all of our like the grocery like basics like milk and cheese and butter and stuff, we still have to go in the store, which is what it is, just wear a mask.


Yeah.


And for the most part I've done um most of the grocery shopping just because uh my life and I just had an agreement that I would do it during the pandemic and I just can't get it worked out pretty well for her at least.


Yeah. Uh huh. I want to catch that.


Yeah, and I've had a lot more free time. Just my work's been a lot quieter, so I work from home a little bit more and just have more time to do it and her schedule has stayed pretty much the same, so it's not fair for me to do it.


Do you have any pets?


Yeah. Um No, not never know right now. I had two french bulldogs and they were brothers and they we had to have him put to sleep within two months of each other and they've been gone about a year now.


Yep. Oh. Oh no, I'm sorry, that's tough.


So here's a picture of one of mine, the other one, I don't have a picture right here but that was deter.


Oh, it's so cute. Mhm.


And then I had a cream colored one that his name was boomer.


Yeah. No, well I can imagine it's hard to like people like think, oh you just, you know, get another dog and it's like, it never is like that, you know, it's, you know when you have that emotional connection with a pet, it's so, you know, it's like losing a family member.


And I have I've had them since they were eight weeks old, so it was devastating for us, you know? Yeah. It is, It is. Well I lost my son in 2009. My oldest son, he was murdered here.


Oh jeez, I'm sorry, I can imagine it's a lot of work.


Um Thanks. Um, so it's been 11 years. But um, that was, you know, the worst thing in my life losing him, you know? And then my mother three years later and then, you know, of course these dogs, you know, and it's hard on me, you know, like I kind of want another dog, but I don't know, it's just, it's not just that you get so attached to them and then I have to go through that, you know I mean?


Yeah, yeah, it's it's tough, you know that it's such a double a double edged sword there because they provide so much happiness and joy, but then it's like such a heartbreaking, you know.


But I do like dogs, you know, I don't know, have to see how our goals. Yeah.


Yeah, most dogs, you know, they only lived to be eight or nine years old, so it's like, you know that you know, you kind of know that that's coming the whole time you have a dog, you know, we have a dog and it's like he's such a good dog and I can't help thinking like we're gonna be so heartbroken and this, you know.


Yeah.


I know, it's so hard.


Three now. Yeah. Yeah.


Mine were all nine years. They were nine years old and I lost 11 last May and then one in july and Well the first boomer, the cream coloured one had a tumor on his leg.


Yes. They probably they grew up together, they probably just they must have missed the one once. The one that survived was alone. He must have known that assembling was gone too.


It was like a hanging tumor and they were gonna, they were gonna remove it.


Yes, I find that funny.


You know, I had it all set up to remove it and he had his, he had eye problems too. But um, we were getting that under control, but when they went in to check him before the surgery, they found out he had heart problems.


Oh yeah.


Yeah. So there he started getting worse, you know, and they wouldn't do the surgery. And we decided the best thing for him was to be able to sleep. You know. Well then deter the brown one here. Two months later, his neck got real big and he couldn't breathe and I took him to the bat and they said they believe he had thyroid cancer and they put him right, they had to put him right to sleep, he couldn't breathe.


What days?


So it was very hard. It was unexpected for deter boomer. We kind of knew that, you know, but peter, I mean it was just shocking. I thought it would happen for at least another year or two, you know, but no, and french bulldogs have a lot of health problems anyway.


I've heard that?


And at the time that I that we got these dogs, we had, you know, I was working then not only the amount of fixed income and it was hard to keep their back bills paid, you know, even though I did it, but so I don't think I would get another one even though I love french bulldog, I mean I just do, but um, for that it wouldn't be fair to him, you know, I wouldn't be able to take care of them like I did them, you know, so where I so on, I thought about getting a Shiba or uh is that what they're called?


Yeah. Yeah. It's very that is very very expensive. Even if your dog has no health problems, like an annual checkup at the vet is like a serious expense. I think the last time. Yeah, I was shocked. Yeah. The little little dogs.


The from Jabs are from Japan.


Oh yeah, shibu Shiva itsu or yeah, they like, yeah, yep bulldogs have such great personalities to their very uh big personal, you know, affect a sweetheart.


Yeah. Thought about though. Uh We'll see, you know. Yeah, they are they're french bulldog, They're great.


Yeah.


I mean they're just so smart. They are so smart.


All right. I don't know. I wish I could get one, but it wouldn't be fair to it and I just I don't want to do that, you know? So.


It's gonna be tough to like we have uh family that lives outside of boston and uh it's difficult for them to go outside and walk the dog because there's so many people, you know, there's people in their apartment, there's people you know on the sidewalk, there's people out in the parks, so it's like, you know, even to go outside and walk the dog, you're exposing yourself to like dozens of people.


Mhm. Right.


Uh huh.


Right. Yeah.


Mhm.


I don't go out that often. I do blow a little bit walk or whatever. Oh, I just hate I wish it would go away maybe.


Me too. Yeah. Yeah. Well I mean we're lucky just because there's a lot, you know, there's a lot that we can do outside um that kind of, you know, we're able to do a lot of the things we like to do still just because they were kind of social distance activities before, you know, we backpack a lot and hike a lot and fish a lot.


Okay. We are.


Um and those are all things that like we can still do because you never really around people that much.


Right.


Um So we've been lucky and it means, I mean just in general main is very uh there's just a lot of space, a lot of privacy, not a lot of people. So it feels we've been very felt very lucky um to be here for the pandemic.


All right. All right. You have kids?


I do not. My wife has a son um from her prior her prior relationship, but we just have a dog between the two of us.


Yes. Well, yeah.


Yeah. Yeah, yeah. We had we had talked about it and uh I'm just part of me is really glad that we that that it didn't happen just because I can't imagine raising a child right now just with the state of the world and um I just I just I have a lot of sympathy for people that are raising Children um through the past.


Oh and all right. Mhm.


Yeah. Yeah, it just seems like yeah, so we we've been were childless but we're definitely uh we're okay with that decision for the time being.


Yeah. It must be one word. All right.


Yeah.


Yeah. Mine are all grown Well, my oldest son got killed and then I have a daughter that's 31 and then a son that's 29. So my daughter lives while on the other side of town here And my 29 year old son lives with me.


Do they live near you?


So he helps take care of me and you know.


But you're right.


Oh, yeah, Yeah.


Yeah, that's pretty, pretty common situation nowadays for, you know, Children to be kind of keep staying close to the family and helping out. And just financially, it's, you know, cost of living is so high and wages are so low that It's tough.


Especially for that age range. You know, people in that kind of 20-30, you're all range.


Yeah. Yeah. So what do you think about our new president?


Uh, well, see I I voted for biden.


I'm not really, you know, I have a hard time putting myself in like either political party just because there's certain things. I, you know, I'm a fiscal conservative socially. I'm pretty liberal, but I also am very pro gun. Uh, so it's, it was tough. You know, my vote really was based on the pandemic. Um, and just kind of who I thought would get us out of it the quickest.


All right.


What about you then?


I didn't I didn't vote. I I don't I don't know.


Like about her?


I couldn't I couldn't make up my mind and I just I don't know. I didn't really care for either one of them, you know? So yeah.


Yeah, it was an old man competition that was kind of disappointing. It's like I didn't really, you know, neither one of them were, I thought a good choice. Um It just seemed like, you know, the machine has made up its mind and told us who are choices were and that was that was it.


Right.


And it's just um yeah, it's interesting in maine now we have ranked choice voting, which is kind of cool.


Yeah.


Um It allows you to uh it makes it easier for like third party or off non party candidates um to get votes and actually stay kind of relevance.


Mm hmm.


So you can if there's something you like, that's not one of the like the lead, you know, lead democrat or republican, um you can vote for them first and then if they don't win, it goes to your next choice down.


So it's not like you're throwing away your vote, which I think a lot of people feel, you know, if they vote for somebody that's not, you know, the person with, you know, like there were other running for president this year other than biden and trump, but people feel like there walked into one of those decisions.


Right warrant.


Yeah. But with ranked choice voting, it's pretty neat. You can actually vote for some and support somebody that you actually feel, you know, is in line with your values and uh, and not feel like you're just throwing away your vote if they don't win. So this here we had it for present, the presidential election, which was kind of neat.


I Yeah, that's pretty neat. Uh huh.


Yes.


Yeah. I don't know. I don't know about it. I mean this I think on trump, I think trump was very upset that he was so or he's not and he thinks there's a big scam going on with this voting, so Yeah.


It doesn't seem to be a very gracious loser. Right? Okay. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't sound like they're making much headway into proving that so far.


Yeah, that's that's just how I mean. You think, you know, it's just how politics works. You know sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, you know just it seems to go from, you know it just keeps swinging back and forth. You know four years from now, probably have a Republican governor, Republican president and then we'll go back for four years and then we'll go back to a democrat.


One yeah right.


It's just like just kind of seems swap swap back and forth and maybe that's good, you know, I mean at least that kind of seems to keep things balanced out a little bit, you know you don't end up you know too far to the left or too far to the right. Yeah, neither one were particularly inspiring.


They're not I don't know.


Yeah, my dad is um younger than joe biden remember like voting? I was thinking, man, you know, you know my dad still got most of his facilities, well I mean he's still be sharp for his age but um I was thinking man I don't know if I like he's too old to be president and joe biden is older than him.


Yeah. Yeah he is old but yeah.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah I'm surprised I'm surprised there hasn't been like uh you know just you know like kinda like another JFK like a really young kind of youthful you know energetic you know it seems like we keep getting stuck with all these people that are Yeah one step what's happened the nursing home.


Mhm. The rhine I don't think trump took this virus very serious. You know he didn't take it very even after getting getting it.


Yeah.


He didn't you know. I don't know.


Yeah not everybody can get a trip to the hospital in a helicopter you know.


Alright.


Mhm.


Right.


You know my neighbor had to go to the ICU you know in the back of a ford escort. Yeah. You know and it was an hour and a half drive to get to the you know the ICU from here.


Yeah it's sad it seems like the whole like wearing masks thing. Once that got politicized, that kind of sealed the deal for us in terms of where things are going to go.


Yeah, very odd.


All right.


But regardless of my political affiliation, I'll continue wearing a mask and try and try to encourage other people, other people to do the same.


Right. Need to I do what I'm supposed to do. What honey that.


Yeah. It seems like a pretty common sense thing, you know? Yeah. If you're in for surgery, you expect everybody to be wearing a mask. Yeah.


But yeah, we'll see.


Yeah. Yeah.


Hopefully. Yeah, Maybe by next spring, all of the vaccine, hopefully.


Yeah there will be.


You think you're in the corner?


No we love it.


Yeah. I'm ready for life to go back to normal. Whatever normal was before the vaccine here. Before the virus.


What? Why?


Yeah.


I agree.


Cool. I think we're at our, at our time mark there.


Are we?


Um, We are, yeah, we got, we got a whole 25 minutes in.


Oh wow that's good. Okay well have a good day. It was nice talking to you.


Yeah. It's not nice talking to you to stay healthy. And uh, yeah, I have a great holidays, Right?


Yeah you too by the way.


Okay. Yeah. Oh yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh huh. For young professionals, close quarters combat. Yeah, A complimentary. All right.


Hello are we to start now?


Hello there I guess.


Uh Hi I'm Catherine.


Uh huh I'm julie.


Nice to meet you julie.


I'm sorry my my dog is scratching and it's.


Uh huh.


Uh huh. Come on baby girl, come on go to your bed, go to your bed. So are you from Julian?


I am from Wisconsin quite a way.


Yeah. Oh wow. Uh I don't know how far that is from New Jersey. Yeah.


Uh huh. How are you enjoying the pandemic?


Oh um Not really enjoying it, it's like you're one of the first people that I talked to since the shutdown. So um yeah I mean I don't we don't really go out because we're living with my in laws right now and they're old so we try to minimize the going out stuff with my husband.


Really? Oh yeah.


Yeah. So yeah it's been a while since I talked to another person side phone family.


Yeah.


So I kind of like practice.


Uh huh. Uh huh. Yeah.


So ah it plans for the weekend.


Yeah. I don't, I haven't planned what?


Yeah. Any plans for the weekend?


Uh no, actually really none at all.


Which is kind of the way I prefer it.


Yeah. Yeah it's uh my I'm talking to my husband and I was like you know what this pandemic is actually doing good for my mental health because I have a lot of anxiety and so being an introvert, it's uh it's a blessing for me, I'm not forced to like socialize and be out there and you know.


Uh huh. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I mean I feel kind of the same people ask me and I'm like, it's not that different from my regular life.


Yeah. Okay. Uh huh.


In fact, it's given me a lot of time to really kind of reevaluate things and I just quit my job this week, wow.


Right. Mhm. Nice. I mean, I don't know if it's a good news for you.


Right, right. It's like I'm just, I've realized that I, you know how much I really hate it and how much stress it causes me.


Uh huh.


And so it's like, you know what, this is a perfect time to explore a little bit and figure out my passion again, you know?


Yeah. Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I like the is that a paint painting in uh in the background?


Okay inside it's a tapestry on the wall.


Oh yeah, it's really cool. Is it like a is that elephant?


Thank you. It's an elephant.


Huh? That's interesting. Oh now I see it, I thought it was a snake, like a cobra with the ears.


Yes I was. Yes, yes and it's one of those looks different, you know when you're standing up close you can't really help you have to be further away.


That's really cool. Mhm.


So trying to get my Yes.


Yeah. Oh yeah, the eyes and the ears. I I see it now. Yeah. So uh sorry, my my dog is really um distracted me.


You have any dogs?


Oh I have a cat.


Animals? Yeah, that's good to hear.


One cat.


Yeah, I want to have a cat but my husband is allergic to cats and my dog doesn't like cats so yeah.


Okay so it might be a while. A long while, okay I am divorced, I got divorced I guess about 2.5 years ago And after 23 years.


Yeah way so um if you don't mind me asking are you married kids? Mhm. Yes. Mhm wow.


Uh Yeah wow. Is right a shitty marriage for the most part.


Yeah.


I mean yes exactly, I'm super proud of myself.


Yeah. Well congratulations you got out of it? Yeah. All right.


I mean everyone's like oh you poor thing and it's like oh my God no It's one of the best things I ever did and I have a 15 year old daughter who is with me.


Yeah. Mhm. Oh right.


She we adopted her from Guatemala.


Mhm. Oh uh that's so cute.


She was a baby. So, um, it's very nice, very nice.


I'm, I'm happy.


All right.


You know, I'm, I mean, I won't say a 100% happy because like who is right?


Are you dating? Yeah. Yeah.


But it's such a better change for me.


Um uh no, I'm not dating at all.


Yeah. Well that's good to hear. Are you dating currently?


I haven't even attempted to date. Uh you know, I said to someone like the last time I had a first date was 1991, like put that in perspective, You know what I, and I've been really shitty at small talk and how's the weather and all that stuff, you know?


Mhm. Well it takes time. Uh huh wow. Yeah. Yeah me too.


Um right now, I don't know, I run the gamut some days I think that I will want to partner again and something they think, you know what, this is all nice just being, you know, he was very he was very emotionally abusive and verbally abusive.


Mhm. Mhm. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah like after 23 years I can't imagine not wanting. Yeah that's worse than physical abuse.


So I mean every day it was like, you're a bitch, you're we are worthless, you suck at this, you're so stupid, you know, and I'm not stupid.


Oh wow. Oh Lord.


I mean I'm very educated and I'm I'm a good person, you know, I have a good heart and I mean what I've read is that narcissists attract em paths and that was, that was our dynamic.


Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


You know, everything was all about him. And um I was just like, oh well here let me help you with this or let me do this or you know, um it took a long, it took a long time for me to admit even that I was in an abusive relationship because you just you don't want to get yourself.


Uh huh. Yeah. Yeah. Isn't, mm. Mhm. Yeah. You loved yeah you love that person and sometimes it's just you're you're blind too what he does and it's just it's hard.


Exactly. Exactly. And when I came here, it was like we moved to a small town about three hours from where we lived before um my brother and my nephews are here, so that's really helpful for my daughter especially.


Yeah. Oh Uh huh Right. Uh huh Most of family Mhm, yep.


But it was like I could come in the house and the same full of dishes and there was no one screaming at me, you know, it was fantastic.


Yeah.


Like nice.


Can't you even load the dishwasher for christ? You know? It was like I had to like recalibrate to be like I can learn how the hell I want.


Oh yeah.


It can be a total mess or it can be totally clean and that's all okay.


Uh huh mhm. Mhm.


So Yeah.


Well that's that's really good of you, I'm so happy to hear that.


Uh huh.


Yeah, well I am, what was that?


How on a daily, how long have you been married?


Right Um actually it's our third-year anniversary next week to uh yeah July 20 yeah three years.


Uh huh. Oh no. Okay.


Um we're still not tired of each other not yet.


Uh huh, wow.


Ask me again in seven years maybe but um mhm, yep, yep, I mean we we came from two different cultures so that's definitely um has two sides of the story, so sometimes it's a good thing because it keeps the relationship interesting but sometimes I'm like I'm so sick of your shit, I don't want to talk to you so yeah it definitely has its ups and downs.


Yeah. Yeah, but it has its ups and downs, you know? Uh huh.


But I I got lucky because um I couldn't have backs for a better husband than my husband because it's literally like a saint. Like I feel guilty because how you're describing your husband, I'm like am I like that like emotionally abusing my like sometimes I would find myself blackmailing my husband to do things for me, but you know it's like okay baby can you do this for me because I am doing this and this, you know it's like sometimes I would force him to fold the clothes like the laundry because I hate doing that but like you know it's we gotta do it something some someone has to do it.


Mhm. Uh huh. Yeah. Ah. Yeah. Uh huh. But. Right. Right.


But yeah uh currently I'm busy preparing for um it's actually also his birthday Next week, so our anniversary is the 20th and then Um his birthdays on the 23rd. So it's uh Yeah.


Oh wow.


Yeah, I'm actually thinking what am I going to give to him? It's like you know every year I am reading out of ideas of what to give to him because it's like he's not really into material things.


Uh Yeah. No.


So most of the time it's uh the experiences that he wants or likes more than you know, the the gifts that I give to him.


Yeah. All right.


So um this year I am surprising him to a stay in upstate new york, so just the two of us and the dog for a couple of days just to unwind.


A box.


And he works for amazon and he manages the building Which is like they literally work them 8200 hours every week every day.


Okay. Yeah. Cash.


Yeah. Yeah and I'm like well no wonder your boss is the richest man in the world.


All right.


Yeah. Yeah. I mean you would think that having or working for a company like Amazon would command a really good salary but it's not which is like really surprising because with the amount of work that they give to them it's pay shit.


Well yeah. And work that many hours.


Uh huh.


The pay is even worse if he's salary, wow.


Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. I would find myself complaining at two a.m. Because his phone is going off because there is a problem in the building and I'm like at you at least like you know four hours silence your phone is like if something happened and I'm not there or they can't contact me, I'm going to be in big trouble. So. Yeah. Yeah it's uh it's been promoted actually proud of them three times in less than two years which is which is a huge deal.


Mhm. Right.


And um recently he just got another it's a lateral move. But um he'll be working online so he's going to be working from home.


Oh very Oh.


None of those crazy um stuff working at the warehouse. Um He manages yeah he manages extra large building, so mattresses, TVs, you know these big stuff and during the pandemic you would think who would order, you know those stuff like tv but they're still shipping like 1000 packages every day every day and that's like really really crazy for me.


Mhm. Uh huh. Right, wow.


And yeah like where are these people getting money from? I thought you know the economy is down, people are going out of jobs but that people are still spending thousands of dollars for these things, so.


Well, and I wonder what the pandemic, I mean I wonder I hope been a lot of have realized that they not have the resources to survive something like this because you know like my daughter and I were driving down the road and she said something about getting the car and I said look at all the cars passing us.


Uh huh. Mhm. Mhm. Yeah. Something about, yeah. Mhm.


How many of those people do you think actually own their car?


Yeah, that's you can.


You know like people are complaining, oh I have no money, I have no money and I get it.


Mhm.


But it's like has this impacted your thoughts about saving money and preparing that emergency fund so that I mean right now, I mean, I quit my job and it's not like I'm rich, but I I'm going to figure it out, you know?


That's true. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


But I have enough to pay my bills right now.


Yeah.


And I, a lot of people are like, oh, give me money, give me money, give me money because I have nothing, You know?


Yeah. Yeah. Mhm. That's true.


And they're working for a hell of, a lot more than I make.


Mhm. Yeah, that's true, yep. It's like I'm an immigrant, I just moved here like three years ago before I came here.


Okay, Okay.


Um I'm from the Philippines. So back home, my idea of America was free, health care, free education. And Diana came here. The first, the first thing that I did was um to uh Atlanta new york JFK and then I tried using one of the cards and I'm like, why is it locked, why can't I take one? And then the uh the the what if the janitor said, oh you have to pay for it. I'm like, what? I said 4 95 and I'm like, I've traveled a lot and this is the only country that I have ever been that I have to pay to use a card.


I mean even in my country it's free. And I said to myself, I must be really in America because yeah, and I, you you have to pay for this and it's just and then living here for quite some time.


Right. Where everything costs something?


Uh it made me realize that um well this is America for me, I guess. It's, it's not as land of the free as I thought it is. You have to, everything, everything has a cost and consumerism here is embraced so much that even though I have a, I have a neighbor who has this huge houses so many luxury cars, then how, how do you know that they're not in credit?


Yeah. Yes. What? Exactly?


Yeah. So mhm.


And we're told over and over get this product the more you buy the better.


I mean, yeah.


I mean, what I'm in the midst of right now during this pandemic, I have de cluttered, oh my gosh, I had all this stuff in my garage from my marriage, you know, I didn't ever sort through it because I really didn't want to look at it at the time.


Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


It was too upsetting, you know, And I literally went out there, I spent two entire days And I took six carloads of stuff.


Yeah. Yeah. Uh huh. Yeah. Well, yeah.


Two good war.


Oh, wow.


I didn't, I just like looked at all my wedding china and all that and I'm like, screw it, I don't want that.


Okay. Yeah. Yeah.


II plan to retire within about four years and I want to travel and I want to live like, let's say six months in san Diego and a year in Oregon and like, I don't need any of that crap.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah. Mhm. Oh, right. Thanks.


I'm not going to take that with me on my next leg of the journey. And I tell my daughter all the time like our thing is travel and experiences.


Mhm. Yeah. Yeah.


And I said, I will spend money on that.


Oh yeah.


I will not spend money on buying a bunch of shit that we don't need, I won't use or I'll get rid of three years later.


Okay. Exactly. Oh yeah. Okay.


You know it's like I mean I'll sometimes by like original artwork, I like art a lot if I go to art galleries and such.


Yeah, it's okay. Sure. Mhm, mm.


I mean I maybe we'll buy something that really resonates but like all this stuff that we buy, I mean it's our culture is just like we shot for fun, you know we don't even shop for need.


Mhm. Yeah. Because it, yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


Yeah.


It's like my um, well, my in laws here, um, they would buy stuff because it's on sale like, so why do you have a six person tent?


And like, well my parents thought if it's a good deal. Yeah.


Uh huh.


How many times do they use it once? And how many, how many, how long has it been stored at the garage? I don't know since I was a kid.


Yeah. That's that's exactly the conversation that happens all the time here. They've got like a bunch of stuff sword everywhere around the house.


Right, yep.


And it's just crazy to me how you have all of this stuff that you Haven't used and there are stuff that haven't been used in 50 years and they're still there because it was a good deal at that time.


Mhm. Mhm. Right.


And you know in America I mean really most of us are quite spoiled because we have space so we have all this empty space and we feel like you know one of my friends said to me that her husband wants a bigger house and she said to him what we actually need is a tiny home because the amount of space you have is the amount of space you feel like you need to fill.


No, but. Mhm. Exactly. Yeah. Mhm. Mhm. Help. Mhm. Yeah fiber. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


So it's like, yeah.


No.


Oh we just, I don't know.


Oh yeah. Yeah. My husband and I are talking about, it's either a tiny house for us or a van, like a converted van.


Uh huh Love it.


So yeah so we could travel around, I've always wanted to travel around the States but because of his job and we're tied to one place but now that is also working from home I'm like you know what why don't we just build that Vanda we've always wanted to and it's really that much It's like I've seen a couple we can build one for like 20,000 25,000 and be your house we have you know all we need is a solar and an internet and a Porta potty.


Yeah. Yeah. Yes. And I love that. I mean if I were younger I would totally want to do that.


Okay. Mhm Yeah and yes.


My I mean I would like to convert, like I've seen school bus conversions and stuff like that.


Yeah.


My knees are bad. I can't be crawling around in a van.


I'm too fat, too old for that.


But you know what I mean?


Uh huh Freedom yeah.


Like I want that kind of a of a freedom of a interest not accumulating all the stuff and you know, I tell my friends like Some of them think I'm kind of crazy in that regard.


Yeah mhm But I was no.


But I said like I would rather go out and drop $100 or $200 or $200 on a tasting menu from a sheriff.


Okay mhm. It yeah mhm mhm.


It's san Diego. Then I would to buy shit from TJ Maxx or you know, like it's not that I don't want to spend the money, but I want, I just don't want the stuff and I'd like to be mobile.


What? Yeah. Okay mm. Yeah exactly it's yeah yeah allow yeah.


I mean that's kind of what I'm working on now, that I've quit my job. I'm taking a class in psychic development and I'm trained in raking and stuff and I want to like develop a passion for something that I can do from anywhere so that I can travel around and do whatever I want.


Uh huh It's not yeah Yeah Yeah yeah mhm With the official kids on your own.


I mean, I've got three more years until my daughter graduates from high school, so I am homebound.


Until then I tried to talk her into home schooling um from a tiny home, but she didn't want to do that.


Yeah I mean yeah. Uh huh Or not He'll get there eventually.


So I, and I think she's there. I mean in her adult life I will see her as a wanderer.


Yes.


But it's hard when you're a teenager, you know and you want like real friends and a boyfriend and all that stuff.


Oh what? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


Um So we are we are in, I don't want to say stuck, we are choosing to be in Wisconsin for another three years.


Mhm. God it's was also you know. Mhm.


But after that I've told her like don't plan, I'm at home to your bedroom because there's not going to be any bedroom, There may be a foldout couch or you know, it is to me, I mean my family thinks I'm crazy.


Yeah. Okay. Oh yeah. Uh huh. That's that's exciting. I yeah. Yeah.


They think I've lost my marbles, you know.


Yeah. How we get that do but Mhm.


But oh, so many people are trained to just, you work your whole life 8 to 5, you know, blah blah blah and you by the house, you're married, you have the kids, you have the mortgage, you have the brand new cars, blah blah blah and I don't want that.


Yeah. Yeah. At six ft. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And at 60 or 65 you retire and then you go on cruises and uh you wait.


Oh and you die.


Yeah.


Uh huh. You know and a lot of people die before they get to enjoy much of anything at all.


Uh huh. Of the.


You know I mean I think it's amazing that you found that your husband has similar ideas.


Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.


You know That's amazing all.


Yeah. Yeah. He's talking of kind of working I mean working 100 hours a week really tire you out. So right now he wants to get a certificate uh for I think program management or something so you can actually apply to other companies that okay we'll pay him more.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


Um Right now we're working towards that but eventually his ultimate goal is to become a house husband, which I don't blame him.


Off. Oh.


Uh huh.


Um but yeah, we don't have any kids not pointing on having any anytime soon.


Oh yeah.


It's just, you know, it's expensive to have a kid and it will take a lot of your time. And um right now it's just for for my generation, it's just a, not a thing to do at our age is it's like, yeah, 31 Yeah, yeah, husband is 30.


How old how old are you? 31 okay. Mhm.


And uh what you had a hard time getting pregnant or when you were different?


I didn't become a mom until I was 37. I started trying to get pregnant when I was 30 and um I mean yes it was damn near impossible Party at 35.


Well, Uh huh. And Mhm, mm hmm. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Do you like yet?


I decided what the hell am I doing? Like why am I trying so hard and then and then we adopted we decided well I decided we were that thing And I went that road and I'm so glad that I did.


Mhm. Yeah. Mhm. Uh huh.


But I mean I wasn't ready at all to even think about kids until I was 30 and early.


Yeah.


It was like, let's just see what happens kind of thing.


And Yeah. Yeah.


By the time I got to like 33 or 34 it was like, Oh my God, I want to be a mom.


Mhm. Okay. Yeah.


Um, it has to happen, you know.


Yes. And Oh, Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know that's what my mom has been telling me because I grew up in a culture where 28 is almost considered a spinster. Yeah, yeah, so I've been, we've been married for three years and I'll tell you, my mom and dad has been asking me every couple of months, you know, when when am I going to see a baby from you?


Uh huh.


And I'm like, I don't know, maybe not ever. And they're like, yeah, your your room will expire and you know, the genes it's going a waste.


And I'm like, the reason why I'm going to have a baby is because, you know, we're mentally financially emotionally ready, not because of the pressure of my parents. I mean, I understand that they're not getting younger.


Right.


Yeah. It's just sometimes the pressure from them, it's just sometimes it it makes me think, you know, this is what they want for me, Maybe it's signed. But then I would list the cons of why we don't want to have a baby right now. And it's just okay. Maybe not, maybe not not right now. And I meet women who are like, like you, for example, who Haven't had Children until they were under later years and if I decide to, okay at 35, maybe I want to have a kid, I'm, I'm tired of traveling and I can't have a kid I'll adopt.


Right, right.


Yeah. So Oh yeah.


I mean, yeah, everyone thinks you're going to run out of options and it's like you really don't ever run out of options.


There's always, there are always options.


Mm hmm. Yeah.


I mean even if I couldn't adapt that could have fostered or you know, there's always, well and it's, it's important to understand other people's wants and needs from your own, you know?


Yeah. Mhm Oh yeah. Mm Right. Basically. Exactly.


Okay.


Everybody, yeah, every one of us has their own journeys.


Yeah. I mean.


So yeah, how was it hard for you to adopt?


Exactly.


Like what's the process?


It was a long process. I mean it was a year and a half.


Uh huh Was it expensive?


It is more paperwork than you can possibly imagine. You know, you need police reports, you need local, you need to stay, you need federally be fingerprinted, you need a whole study, you need classes, you need doctor's notes, you need original birth certificates, marriage certificates, ask for it.


Mhm Yeah, for a while. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, wow. Right.


I mean it's a lot of stuff and then it's a long process on the other country too.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And just the avoid. Oh, mhm He was mhm Yeah.


You know, um, of what they need to do and of course Guatemala being a latino country, you know, everything's manana, manana manana so nothing moves quickly.


Yeah. Yeah.


Ever.


Mhm Oh.


Uh, but you know, I mean, I wouldn't trade it for anything and you just have to know going in that.


Oh yeah. Oh yeah.


It's that it's a long process adopting from the States.


Yeah. Right.


I mean if you're open to a um, biracial child or a latino or african american, it can be relatively quick.


Oh, mm. Uh huh.


I mean, I know people who got all their stuff done and then were chosen and like a month later the mom was having the baby and you know, they would go down to like texas and you're required to stay for like five days with the baby and you head on home with your with your newborn.


Yeah. No. Mhm. Yeah. Uh huh. Mhm It's so what?


You know, we didn't choose that.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


I mean we lived in a very, very small town.


Oh yeah. Mhm.


Um and I don't know, I guess my husband, I mean my ex husband, he wasn't racist or anything.


I didn't think that raising like an african american child in a tiny little town would be a good idea.


Mhm. Yeah I understand.


You know, if I had it to do over again, I probably wouldn't have cared.


Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah.


But but yeah, So we got my daughter when she was 10 months old.


Yeah. Yes. Uh huh. Yeah wow. Well yeah it's just the emotional toll of waiting for a year that sets of such weight.


And it's Yeah, yeah, it is.


Yeah.


But you know, you get into a place where it's like once you see that picture of that baby, that's your baby.


Mm. Yeah mm hmm. Yeah.


So it really doesn't matter. I mean in one hand it's excruciating.


Mhm.


But on the other hand, it's also like, okay, this is my baby.


Yeah. Yeah.


It really matter when she comes.


Yeah. Uh huh.


So if she came when she was 10 months or if she came and she was too, it's still my child, you know?


Well yes. Well. Uh huh. Yeah. Yeah.


So you can kind of let that anxiety go a little bit I guess.


Yes. Well yeah and um I hope you don't mind me asking this was it hard racing an adopted child? I mean she she's different from, she looks different from you is like do people question you, do you get weird?


Um Oh, I mean the good thing about most of our lives being in such a tiny little town that everybody already knew our story.


Looks what? Yeah. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah. Yeah.


So in that town we really didn't get that.


I mean every once in a while now it will be like, that's like, hi I'm celeste mom and they'll look at me and look at her like, huh, what's that I hear from here, You know?


Mhm. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.


Uh huh.


Yeah.


And there have been some older friends that we've had that have made some racist comments. Um not about her but in general and I just say to them like I can't tolerate that.


Yeah wow.


I mean I have a biracial child so that just isn't funny to me.


Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Exactly.


Um it's funny because she is so much a part of me that like I kind of forget that she's adapted.


Yeah. What? Okay. Uh huh.


Like people have said to me when was her first smile and I'm sitting there like uh huh and then I go well shit why am I thinking about that?


Mhm.


I have no idea.


Yeah. Yeah.


I wasn't with her then, you know?


What? Uh huh.


But it's like I don't know you you love them.


So hope.


Just like you would a biological child you almost forget.


Okay hold up. Yeah. Yeah. Well that's that's really that's really nice because um I I had a I have a cousin who was adopted and um it's like in my family adoption is not really not exactly acceptable, it's not the word that I'm looking for but nobody told the child that she was adopted, its like taboo to tell the adopted child that you were adopted.


Uh huh uh huh Oh Oh uh well mm Oh.


So when um some of her classmates in school were teasing her oh you're you're adopted it some mean word to taunt her that she was adopted and she came home crying everybody is saying that I'm adopted and my my aunt went to school and she actually berated the Children for for for yeah.


Oh. Oh wow.


Yeah and I was like why couldn't they just sit her down and tell her the truth because there's no use for them to hide these things because eventually she would know and God forbid she will you stop that.


Oh yes. That's really the worst thing you can do is hide it.


They would What? Yeah. Yeah.


I remember when my daughter was like three and she came home from daycare and she said Tori says that you are not my real mommy and daddy is not my real daddy.


Mhm. Mhm. Okay. Yeah. Mhm.


And I kind of just went oh shit okay wasn't ready to have this conversation yet.


Yeah. You Yeah.


But I said to her, I said so here's the thing you have another mom Who were you in her tummy.


Okay. Absolutely. Mhm. Yeah. Mhm. Mhm.


And so I went and got the picture and I said that this woman Olivia is your mom but I am also your mom, I'm the one who raises you.


Yes. Mhm. Mhm. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh. Mhm.


And so I said the same thing like you have another dad but we are your real mom and dad because we are the ones who love you, we are the ones who tuck you in at night, we are the ones who whatever.


Yeah. What? Yeah.


And I mean my my ex husband was like oh my God what are you doing?


Hello? Yes. Yeah.


Like why are you telling her that and why are you showing her pictures?


Oh yeah.


But for me it was like yes you have to be 100% open.


Mhm.


She didn't understand everything that I said.


Yeah.


She looked at me in a way that she needed me to tell her like and I said I am your real mommy but you also have another mommy.


Mhm. Mhm. Yeah.


You know she was looking to me for that reassurance and um I never lie.


Yeah. Yeah. Mhm. What?


I'm one of those people who's so freakin transparent that I mean I actually I you can oh look I mean some people are like how can you be like that?


Yeah. Yeah, I can sense that. Uh huh. Yeah. Yeah. Mhm Oh exactly.


But I just believe in honesty and it's someone if someone likes me or doesn't like me or whatever, it's like they at least need to make a decision based on knowing me the actual me, not that, that we project to other people, you know?


Exactly. Uh huh Okay. Yeah. Mhm. Yeah, yep, yep, I got what you mean and yeah.


So I mean, yeah, some people think it's a little crazy again, but I don't care, you know?


Uh huh Right. Yeah, if you if you always listen to what others are thinking about you, that's that's not how you live your life.


Yeah, exactly.


I've ever had heart um hardest. Yeah, it's it's like for so long I've been a people pleaser and I'm still am sometimes I find myself wanting to impress the other person because I want her him to like me. But then I would realize why am I doing this if he or she likes me or she or he doesn't like me and so be it. It's like I don't want to live a life where I am limited by what other people might think about me before.


Right, yep.


Used to be so afraid of being criticized, especially after moving here. It's like I speak the language perfectly.


Uh huh right, mm, okay, Right.


But there's still this, um, this image of me in my head that I am inferior to everyone else because I did not, um, I wasn't born here. It wasn't raised here. We're still like when my husband and I got married, I, I received a lot of racist shit from his friends and that was really hurtful. I was like, why am I being, why why am I even here? It's like I didn't even choose to be here. It's just a certain circumstances, circumstances or situation just calls for for me to be here. But you know what I'm like, I forgive, I forget. That's it, I move on. But it's been a learning process for me because before um moving here, I never really experience any, any of those racist attack, but it happened to me and it just devastated me and then eventually you realize, you know, you either um lament on it for so long and it just affects you for so long or you just move on and just don't, you know, let those people prove that you you are what they say that you are dope.


Oh, okay, Right. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. In our country, we pride ourselves so much being open and it's like we totally aren't, you know, we're judging everything and everyone all the time and it's so ridiculous.


Mhm. Oh well all the people Yeah, I bet. Yeah.


I mean, um, no, me neither.


Yeah. It's like I don't even watch the news now recently just as I it should be called instead of United Divisive and I've been telling my husband, oh my gosh, I'm like, do you see what's happening right now?


Yeah, exactly. Exactly.


And like these people have come out of their caves and just spewing all that is hateful hateful stuff and it's not just from one side it's both sides are I think in my opinion are to be blamed. It's like no one backs down. No one wants to I'm not saying everyone but it's just you know everyone has their own opinion.


Forever.


If your opinion doesn't agree with mine it's false news. So it's like it's crazy.


Yes.


Yeah. It is it is so wow.